Thursday, September 28, 2006

Health Insurance, Marriage, and Employment

An online friend suggested to me that I should get married to my current primary lover, simply so that I could be put on her health insurance. This lover has also made this suggestion a few times herself, but hasn't pressed the issue, knowing how I feel about the institution of marriage.

I thought about it very briefly, but just as quckly dismissed the idea. I'd told her if I ever decided to do that, that I would not live with her and that I'd continue my libertine lifestyle unhindered; that would be non-negotiable. I also stressed that I would not consider having children; that I'd been there and done that already.

She agreed to all of this -- all too quickly. For those of you who don't know, she is precisely half my age, having turned 24 last month. I've lived twice as long as she has and I've been through countless lovers. And I know that one day, she'll want a man who will settle down with her to raise children. I'm fully aware that my time with her is of a limited nature and that we don't have a future. Even if I wanted to settle down, I know that she won't want to be tied down to an old man by the time she reaches my age. So, for her sake as much as my own, I told her no.

I might have considered this option a bit more seriously with an older lover; someone who has been around enough to know what she wants, who is at the "been there, done that" phase when it comes to having children, and would know exactly what she'd be getting into by agreeing to my stipulations.

Still, though, I think it's a piss poor reason for getting married, even though I have no doubt that some people do get married for this reason. Even though I take a dim view of marriage, I think those who get married ought to do so because they want to be with the other person and not merely for impersonal, practical reasons. Of course, if this country had universal health coverage that wasn't tied to a person's employment, then this entire conversation would be a moot point.


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