Questions and Answers

Fairly often, I get emails from people asking me questions about my lifestyle. Here are some questions and answers from a recent query.

My first reaction to your adventures was (as a women), how could he
do this, but when you think about it , it really makes you think. With me being a married women with children and a career, I have always wanted a love-free sex life. I'd enjoy it, rather, love it!! Another question relates to being careful in today's world -- are you careful with all your partners or are your regulars different for you? Do you protect yourself with all your partners. and how do you become a regular?

By protect, I assume you mean condoms. Yes, with new partners and one night stands. That tends to go by the wayside with regular partners after a period of time.

A regular is one who is well suited to me sexually, and for those who get especially close, they should be intelligent and be able to carry on a conversation about other things of mutual interest. Of course, the cast of regulars fluctuates over time.....I don't have the time to maintain more than a few regulars and a bit more semi regulars.

I myself would love to know what it feels to be carefree and have sex without feelings.

I am capable of having sex with love, but I don't think they always need to go hand in hand. Both are nice separately as well. And if I love someone, it doesn't necessarily follow that I'd want to limit myself to that one person, any more that I'd spend the rest of my life eating my favorite meal 3 times a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year.

When you meet a new partner what do you say afterwards; say goodbye and thank you, or do you call afterwards?

With a one timer, I thank them and say goodbye. That's it. I don't shoot them a line of shit, telling them I'll call them when we both know full well that I won't.

If I see future possibilities in further meetings, I'll call them within a week or so, usually, depending on what I'm up to at that point in time and their schedules as well.

So why did it not work being married did you feel the urge to be with different women then as well?

I wasn't meant to be married....and I don't think the government has any business involving themselves in people's relationships. So, I am against legal marriage, and think it's up to people to decide what their relationships are for themselves.

I tried to be faithful to her, but I couldn't do it. I only lasted two weeks at that try before I had to go out and have someone else......big fucking joke, that was. So, I got out of it and decided never to live such a lie ever again.

A few days later, another email came from her...

Hello again I have a few more questions: #1 Do you date? #2 What turns you on the most. #3 What was your first desicion to decide on being a libertine. did something or someone decide for you. #4 Do you take care of the women sexually first or is it about getting yours.

1. Do I "date"?

If by that, you mean do I associate with women for purposes other than sex, of course I do. But there's nothing formal about it -- there's none of this formal calling and asking for a date, holding doors, etc.

Getting together with a woman for other activities is limited to 2 or 3 that I'm closest to, and who share common interests with me outside the bedroom.

2. What turns me on the most.

Hmm. I think it's a woman who truly enjoys sex, knows what she wants, and is totally inhibited and guilt free about it. I'm not interested in high maintenance, prissy ladies -- I want a woman who can fuck like an animal when the mood is right. It helps if she's an out of the box thinker in other areas as well and has something that she is passionate about

3. Becoming a libertine.

Unlike most people, I am rather introspective and I question everything. Fairly early on, I realized that I didn't want what most people are brought up to want. My one brief misadventure into marriage cofirmed that. And as I dislike hypocrisy and phoniness, I decided I wasn't going to give lip service to the societal sacred cow of monogamy if I couldn't and didn't want to live up to it. I decided just to live according to my basic nature.

4. Woman first, or me first.

It depends. With my regulars and when I have the time to take my time, I make sure they are satisfied, but with one night stands or when I'm pressed for time and can only have a quickie, I take care of myself first.