Monday, May 26, 2008

The Attraction of the Forbidden

As my readers all know, I regularly monitor the media for opinions I vehemently disagree with, all for the purpose of having something to rant about on this blog. And, as usual, Focus on the Family provided me with some good rant-worthy blogging fodder.

What set me off this time was an interview James Dobson conducted with a woman who'd written a book about mothers who feel as if they are "good enough" mothers. The author mentioned one woman who felt like she was a bad mother for not protecting her teenage son from internet porn, simply because she allowed him to use a computer with an internet connection.

Dobson agreed, mentioning that he had decided not to have internet access in his home because he didn't want to deal with internet porn. One thing to note is that Dobson is of an age where his children are adults and no longer live in his home.

I thought this was a rather extreme measure to go to in order to avoid internet porn, and it smacks of "protesting too much." A person who really wishes to avoid looking at porn has several options open to them that doesn't require the drastic step of banning the entire internet altogether. One doesn't need to throw the baby out with the bathwater.

One can simply avoid visiting porn websites. Most email programs have effective spam filters that relegate porn spam to a spam folder. Spam emails that slip through into one's regular email folder can be quickly deleted and the senders blocked. For those with minor children in the home, several types of filtering software, such as Net Nanny, are available that will block such sites, but will allow users to otherwise use the internet.

I'm guessing the reason Dobson has no internet in his home is likely that he's attracted to such sites and knows he won't be able to keep from looking at them if he has a handy internet connection available.

Leaving aside the fact that indulging in internet porn would make him a hypocrite, considering his religious and political opinions, I just don't get his assertion (and that of the aforementioned book's author) that looking at internet porn is a catastrophe on the level of being a crack addict.

One can indulge in internet porn without it ruining one's life. To use myself as an example, though I look at it occasionally, I am in no way a regular consumer of porn. Indeed, I avoid looking at it too much because after awhile it ceases to be arousing and becomes the same ol' thing. Besides, I'd much rather DO it than merely look at it. At best, porn is best used along with real sex as a sex toy would, or as a wanking aid when alone.

For fundamentalists, I'm guessing that the forbidden nature of it for them is precisely what makes it so irresistible for them. Thus, they feel they must take such drastic steps as described above, lest they fall into temptation.

On the other hand, for people like me, for whom it is not forbidden, it's merely another possibility -- and a minor one at that -- in my sexual tool box. Thus I have no particular irrestible compulsion to view it. It's there whenever I want it, so there's no particular urgency for me to do so.


1 comment:

transfattyacid said...

I guess it depends on what the kid is looking at. In my day about the only thing you had was the lingerie section in the mail order catalogue - oh and page three of the Sun.

In a sense I kind of agree about the damaging effects of Internet porn - particularly the American kind, which depcits women with false breasts, invariably shaven fannys (vaginas to you and me - though I accept that a fanny is at the back door in America), in ridiculously agressive poses - which all build up to the gynaecological shot - which is something I have never understood, because when having sex, the chances of you ever seeing, let alone examining a woman's vagina are pretty slim - and I am allowing for stuff like oral sex in this - why in internet porn is there such an emphasis on the gyaeny shot, as opposed to all the stuff that gets men turned on about women - but I am kind of going back to the lingerie pages in the mail order catalogue at this point.

But this is assuming that this boy was looking at porn involving women - because it could have been anything.

Though in truth I suspect that she is more upset that her kid is growing up and exploring sexuality, than anything relating to the internet.