More Funny Bumper Stickers

A Big Truck Is No Substitute For Proper Genitalia
Constipated People Don't Give a Crap
Love May Be Blind, But Marriage Is a Real Eye Opener
If You Don't Believe in Oral Sex, Keep Your Mouth Shut
My Kid Got Your Honor Roll Student Pregnant
To All You Virgins: Thanks for Nothing
If you can read this it's not foggy, turn off your damn fog lamps
Get a New Car for Your Spouse. It'll Be a Great Trade
Impotence: Nature's Way of Saying 'No Hard Feelings'
I Have the Body of a God: Buddha
I FOUND JESUS -- He was behind the sofa the whole time.
Illiterate? Write For Help
If Sex Is A Pain In The Ass, Then You're Doing It Wrong
Wanted: Meaningful Overnight Relationship
(Spotted on a passing motorcycle)
If You Can Read This, My Wife Fell Off
Veni, Vedi, Visa: I Came, I Saw, I Did a Little Shopping
What If the Hokey Pokey Is Really What It's All About?
Liberal Arts Major. Will Think for Food
Gravity...It's Not Just a Good Idea. It's the Law
If You Want Breakfast in Bed, Sleep in the Kitchen
First National Bank of Dad; Sorry, Closed
If at First You Don't Succeed, Skydiving Isn't for You
The Trouble With the Gene Pool Is That There's No Lifeguard
In America, Anyone Can Be President. That's One of the Risks You Take
Some people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them.
I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
I need someone real bad... Are you real bad?
The more you complain, the longer God makes you live.
I(nternal) R(evenue) S(ervice): We've got what it takes to take what you've got.
Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off now.
Out of my mind...Back in five minutes.
As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools.
Hang up and drive.
God must love stupid people...He made SO many.
Your kid may be an Honor Student, but YOU'RE still an idiot.
Smile, it's the second best thing you can do with your lips.
Where there's a will..I want to be in it.
HONK ... If You Want To See My Finger
Support Cannibalism - EAT ME!
God is my co-pilot, but the Devil is my bombardier.
I don't have a license to kill. I have a learner's permit.
Keep honking while I reload.
Taxation WITH representation isn't so hot, either!
Who were the testers for Preparations A through G?
5 days a week my body is a temple. The other two, it's an amusement park.
EARTH FIRST! We'll strip-mine the other planets later.
If you drink, don't park. Accidents cause people.
If you can read this, I can hit my brakes and sue you..
Jack Kevorkian for White House physician.
Sure you can trust the government! Just ask an Indian!
Alcohol and calculus don't mix. Never drink and derive.
If we are what we eat, I'm cheap, fast, and easy.
Stop repeat offenders. Don't re-elect them!
Focus on your own damn family!
Save Gas.... Fart in a bottle