Thursday, November 11, 2004

Sexual Pet Peeves

Here's a short list of sex-related pet peeves. I'm sure I could think of more if I sat down and thought about it, but these are the ones that popped into my mind first. Enjoy!

Dead Fish; that is, women who do imitations of them in bed.

Sleeping in the wet spot

Women who say yes when they mean no

Women who say no when they mean yes

Women who say no and mean it

Women who get mad at you and cut you off to prove a point

Almost getting caught and having to jump out the window or hide in the closet

Getting caught

The phone ringing just at the point before orgasm

The doorbell ringing at the same interval

Synchrony in “that time of the month”

Premature ejaculation

“Shrinkage”

Jealousy

Involuntary celibacy

Soft core porn

Being too tired for a “command performance”

Rug burn

A woman who leaves hickeys in places you can’t cover up. I’m too old for that shit

Defective condoms

Getting an erection in public when you can’t do anything about it and/or at an embarrassing moment

No comments: